Tuesday, March 02, 2010

I Win!

James Maxey was doing a book give away on his facebook.  The rules were we had to submit a haiku based on his fiction.  Fortunately the winner was based on a drawing and not the quality of the haiku.

And wouldn't you know it, I won.

You can read the haiku's here.  You can wish James a happy birthday while you are there.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Moving Pictures

I notice that one of my last post before taking this blogging sabbatical was a scathing review of The Last Mimzy.

I know it's much easier to write reviews for bad movies, so here are some good movies I have watched recently. Now keep in mind I don't go to the theater much at all any more, so these are most likely movies that have been out a while.


How about starting off with a movie that will get people to call you gay for liking? Well stuff you! This movie was pretty good. It was so nice to see Christina Ricci in a movie where she wasn't playing a tramp, (ex: Black Snake Moan, and Buffalo 66). I say this because when I was 13 a movie came out called Adams Family Values. I don't know why, but I had a crush on Wednesday Adams. One of my first crushes I can remember. Her long black hair and foreboding attitude was something I liked. It was so disappointing to she her grow up to play such ho bags, there in defiling my childhood. Fortunately, she cleans up for her role in Penelope and is in a film I actually enjoy.

Ricci plays the title character, Penelope. Penelope's bloodline was cursed many generations ago by a witch. The next daughter born into the family would reap the detriment of said curse. Well it took a long while for someone in that family to finally sire a daughter, but when they did our Penelope happens to be the cursed child. Her curse? Basically Penelope has a pigs nose and pig ears. Other than that Penelope is modestly dressed, has long black hair, and despite her physical deformities still looks really pretty.

This movie unfortunately falls short by leaning on a Romantic comedy cliche. Guy says I'm this way, but he's not. Girl falls in love with Guy. Girl finds out guy is not who he says he is. Girl leaves guy. Guy shows girl he really loves her.

Despite this, it is still a fun movie to watch.

Star Trek

Yep, I went to the movie theater to see this one. And boy, was it worth it. I would have to see it again to give it thorough praise, but the casting, writing, and action sequences were awesome. I'm not a die hard Trekkie, but I know enough of the mythos to appreciate this movie.

My Name is Bruce

I know I said I wouldn't do any bad movies, but this is worth watching if you like Bruce Campbell. But only once.

Sunday, April 05, 2009

7 is a Very Small Number


Seven post last year. Amazing.

I think I can do better than that this year. That is my hope anyway.

You will have to excuse me, I haven't done this in a while and every time I do it is usually a blog about how many months it has been since my last post, just so you understand why this post is so disjointed.

So no promises this time other than that I will try to post more often.

Even though I am making no promises I think I will give out some blame.

This chair isn't ergonomic enough for me. Stupid chair! I can't blog in a stupid chair.

Guitar Hero is awesome. Stupid awesome game. I can't blog and play Guitar Hero at the same time.

That's all I have for now. I'll just up date this currently reading section of my blog and call it a day. See you in three months. Stupid Blog.

Monday, November 24, 2008

A Return to Arms

Hey there,

Remember me. Yeah, I'm the guy who used to write a blog called Dumb Stuff I Wrote. Now I sit on my ass and play video games. How cool it that? Instead of doing something productive I decided not do anything.

OK, I am being a little hard on myself. Don't get me wrong, there is still no excuse for not blogging. I did have time, but I just got out of the habit. It is a good habit to have. Especially for someone who would like to write for a living someday.

I couple of things could be a cause to my distraction. I got promoted at work, and my wife had a change in job, therein changing the landscape of my life, causing my lack of blogging.

But here's to starting a new/old habit.

Two things could be the reason for starting to write again.

1. I like to do it.

2.James Maxey, who's blog you can find on my links, mentioned this blog in his acknowledgments in the book Dragonforge.

Now the latter is the tipping point. I just needed a reason to start again.

Hopefully my absences will result in a wealth of things to blog about. As opposed to writing about the first thing that comes to mind.

Hoping that I post again this week,

-Jeff (J-Diggy aka Norton G)

P.S. Seeing his pseudonym in print made me realize how ridiculous it is. But, it made it impossible for me to think the mention in James Maxey's book was for anyone else.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

The Last Mimzy

Today I finished watching The Last Mimzy. I am glad it's the last one. Because if they made another, I would have to punch someone in the face.

Where the hell to begin? Well, after I finished watching it, I couldn't stop saying, "Wow, that sucked ass!"

Ahhh! ASS!

Ok, now that that is out of the way, I can tell you why.

First off, the acting. Now, I understand that anytime you have kid actors in a movie, you kind of have to get over that acting of the kids. But, something has to be said about the way they were directed. The main problem was the boy. He really was dead pan throughout most of the movie. Picture this, it's the end of the movie and all hell is breaking loose. His sister ask him to grab this generator thing. His response is, "Yeah, OK." Like the freaking world isn't about to end. Whatever with that crap.

Secondly, the story was ridiculously incoherent. The two kids are on a beach and they find this box full of stones and crap. Also in the box is a stuffed animal bunny named Mimzy. While the kids are playing around with the crap they found they soon realize that the objects inside are unusual to say the least. The rabbit they found starts talking to the little girl. And the stones they found are making the boy a genius at talking to spiders. He uses his ability to talk to insects and arachnids to make them build a bridge for a science fair project. Why he didn't try to take over the world, I will never know.

Anyway, that generator thing shuts down half of Washington states power, there by alerting the FBI. The FBI arrest the kids and their parents, and soon discover that the talking bunny has artificial life. Who gave this bunny artificial life? Well that would be the good folks down at Intel. Yep, Intel. The bunny had "Intel inside". I will wait while you let that sink in...

I hope you have now gotten the phrase "sucks ass" out of you system now, cause it gets better.

Well, with the Intel discovery the FBI is now totally confused. Turns out some one from the future sent all this crap to the past. Not really a surprise, they kind of tell you that from the get;

Well, all of the sudden the kids can now talk to each other with their minds. So they easily escape. The little boy of no more than nine years of age high jacks a truck, in the FBI parking lot I might add, that just so happened to still have the keys in it. Or... maybe the bunny taught the kid how to hot wire. They never really lay that out for you. Not just any truck, a big ass bread truck that could have only been a manual. Now how many of us hopped in a standard transmission car for the first time and just drove off. Not me.

Two words, Su-hucks Ass*.

So the kids escape so they can send Mimzy back to where she came from. Which begs the question. Why the hell did the furture send her here in the first place? HUN? Well, through a series of events way too complicated to write and way too boring to read, they send Mimzy back.

Well, at the end of the movie there is a little sequence from the future where the bunny returns. And because the bunny returns the future is restored. Restored from what? They never really say. But from what I gather, everyone in the future is a jerk. So this guy sends the bunny back to see if any one in the past will send it back to the future. Which if some one sends it back to the future it means that not everyone sucks. And since everyone doesn't suck, all the people that do suck, won't suck anymore. Perfect since!

AHHHHHH!!! Brian hurt.

My buddy Von Urrich gives movie a letter grade. Well, I am kicking this movie out of school. You don't even get a F. To give this movie a F, would be an insult to all the F's I got in school.

So, yeah definitely rent this one if you like Stay, Donnie Darko, or The Matrix.

*Su-hucks is a trademark of Dumb Stuff I Wrote. It may not be republish with out the expressed written consent of Dumb Stuff I Wrote.

Friday, February 01, 2008

Pinky Toe the Size of My Face

Ok, maybe not the size of my face. But last night when I took my dog out so she could do her business, I stubbed my pinky toe on a basket filled with DVD's.

It hurt so bad I was nearly in tears. Keep in mind that this was at 1 o'clock in the morning. So my dog was going crazy jumping all over the bed and running around. My cat wasn't helping by sleeping on my sore food. I thought I broke it last night. It seems to be doing much better now. I still walk with a limp. I wish I was a pirate.

You know... because I wouldn't look like a dork with a limp. I'd look like a pirate... Nevermind, dumb idea.

Friday, January 25, 2008


No, this isn't a post about my plans to create a low budget version of 300 with nothing but sock puppets. Maybe later.

This the the 100th post. DAMN SKIPPY!

Me and my buddy Von Urrich have been having a little blogging war. It is no secret that when it comes to updating my blog, I tend to take my time. Well, since Von, as I like to call him because it is shorter to type, started posting with almost daily frequency, I have also been blogging. Now I think he has me beat in new post this year. But Von, 100! Eat that!

I know that at the pace you are on, you may pass me soon enough. We shall see.

Enough about him, this is my anniversary and I want to look back at all the awesome stuff I have done with this blog. Looking back on my blog, I sure have written a lot of dumb stuff. I have also written some crap I really like.

My Future Scalzi Review is still one of my favorites.

Also see My Letter to my Mini-Van, Don't You Wish Your Girlfriend Could Blog like Me, and Worst Best Man Toast.

I know it might be just me, but I wrote some stuff I still think is funny. It is true that I find myself very entertaining.

Moving forward... I have no idea what I will find to write about. 100 post is cool for me. I know some people who have been updating their blog almost daily for years. I know they spit at my 100 post. But those people use the word musing.

Before I leave you, just one more Cyborg name.

Mechanical Intelligent Knight Engineered for Violence, Infiltration and Ceaseless Killing

Get Your Cyborg Name